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Neural Parenting by Parenting For Brain
January 18 at 6:03 PM ·
Do toddlers have tantrums because they don't get their way?
When my daughter started having terrible twos tantrums, it was frustrating. exhausting and sometime even embarrassing.
Most parents, including myself, would notice that one of the biggest triggers of toddler tantrums is when they don't get what they want. So it's natural to think that is the reason for having a meltdown.
But then I noticed something else.
There are many other situations when a toddler would break down without involving trying to get their way.
For example, when my daughter and I were getting ready to go out, I said, "Let's put on our shoes. We don't want to be late." And then my kid would have a full-on meltdown. She wasn't trying to get her way. And she wasn't being scolded for doing something wrong. I was just nudging her a little bit, and she broke down. Why was that?
That's because babies are born with a very mature alert system. This alert system is very good at sounding the alarm at the slightest hint of danger or discomfort for survival.
But this system doesn't come with an off switch. It needs to be switched off by another part of the brain which has yet to be developed.
So, the real reason for tantrums is that a toddler doesn't have the regulating circuit developed in their brain yet. When a toddler is upset, frustrated, stressed, or sad, their nervous system becomes over-reactive and cannot turn itself off.
Not getting their way is only a trigger, not the cause of tantrums.
If we want to help our kids stop having tantrums, we have to address the cause, not the triggers. We need to help our kids calm down during tantrums and develop their emotional regulation circuit.
This is why I've written Calm The Tantrums to teach parents how to do that. Check it out.
https://www.neuralparenting.com/f/calm/ga
The Little Gym of Frederick added 7 new photos.
December 21, 2020 at 1:30 PM ·
A last minute wishes and needs list! Can anyone help this little guy out?! He is 3 almost 4 years old. He wears a 5T and a size 12 Shoes. He loves Cars Movies and Lightning McQueen and Red & Blue are his favorite colors. We are very hopeful we can get a twin size bed for him so that he can share a bedroom with his mom. Please let us know if you can assist! 
Calling all of our Santa’s helpers for one last big push. Unfortunately, the need is continuing to roll in, and we have received 14 new worksheets this morning. We still have about 18 tags that haven’t been claimed with serious need attached to them, and so if you know somebody please share, share our album, share our videos, send people to our Facebook Page - we need your help.
Extra Drop Off Time Added tomorrow - SUNDAY - from NOON to 4 PM!!!
Copied from Gift Request Album: We are pleased to announce the start of our holiday giving tree, and I’m sorry to say, this year we need your help more than ever! As always thank you so much for your generosity, kindness, and help for so many families in our area.
*** As a caveat, if any of you are aware of a family that has suffered significant hardship due to Covid, and you feel like their family really needs help to keep magic in their holiday, please contact me right away. We will do our best to assist.
- In order to claim a tag, please comment directly on that photo, with the word CLAIMED by ______ Family.
- Drop off hours will begin on Monday, December 13th.
- hours will be 8 AM to 9 AM Monday through Friday, 3:30 PM to 6 PM Monday through Friday, and we will have a special drop off time frame on Saturday, December 19 from 9 AM to 12:30 PM.
- All gifts must be store-bought, new with tags, and you may include a gift receipt if you so choose.
- we also have a need for family style gifts, for instance gift cards to a local restaurant so that the whole family could order takeout and watch a movie, or a gift certificate to go ice-skating, or a gift certificate for and ice cream shop for the whole family. Those kinds of splurges are very Much appreciated.
- you are not limited to purchasing what is on the tag, and throwing in magical extras is always fun and exciting for the kids!
- we have the most difficulty getting people to adopt the older children and teenagers, and many of the young adults or kinship caregivers have needs as well.
- ALL GIFTS MUST BE RETURNED BY DECEMBER 19th
- after December 19, we will still accept worksheets from emergency removal families, and will ask for urgent help during those last few days.
- We will be looking for volunteers to help us deliver on Sunday, December 20th. Trucks and SUVs are a huge help.
The Little Gym of Frederick added 29 new photos.
December 20, 2020 at 4:06 PM ·
We have tags for 14 new sheets that came in today, mostly from the shelter or shelter transitional family care. We are asking for urgent help for these kids, and we still have a dozen or so in the main album that have yet to be claimed. We are having a man success with donations of the need-based items, but we are coming up a little bit short on magic this year when it comes to the dream wishes and the magical toys and stuff. If you know anybody that can help please let us know! Share our posts, and let’s make Christmas miracles happen!!! 
The Little Gym of Frederick added a new photo.
December 19, 2020 at 12:50 PM ·
